Limericks - Fun with Politics

-- by David Swink

Date and context Limerick
Why write limericks? When news from The Swamp gets too thick /
And starts to make you feel sick /
Grab paper and pen /
And with your own spin /
Summarize in a limerick
2021-01-01: (#49)
Mallard Fillmore's 2021
New Year's Resolution
-- by Bruce Tinsley		 We'll no longer rant, rage and shout /
When there's nothing to be mad about /
'Cause now we can be ... /
More "objective", you see ... /
Since that mean Orange Man will be out
2020-10-21: (#48)
On the Hunter Biden email scandal		 Hunter Biden took copious notes /
Of sweet deals with China he wrote /
When his laptop appeared /
Big Tech just went weird /
And news of the scandal was choked
2020-07-23: (#47)
On the FCPS fall closure, with teachers' faux Kung Flu concerns overriding parents and taxpayers		 For school board you did vote /
It's now entirely 'woke' /
You've paid for tuition /
Schools closed, no admission /
Now don't you feel like a dope?!
2020-05-12: (#46)
On the coronavirus lockdown		 The Chinese gave us the flu /
And "experts" we listened to /
So we "sheltered in place" /
Laid our economy to waste /
What a stupid thing to do!
2020-04-03: (#45)
On the world's reaction to the coronavirus		 Those rascally Red Chinese /
Have brought the world to its knees /
Not with military might /
But to their delight /
The power of the sneeze
2020-01-07: (#44)
On the media's reaction to Gen. Soleimani's demise		 That Iranian general was killed /
And Americans in general were thrilled /
But Dems and their press /
Were very upset /
Their hatred for us can't be stilled
2019-12-18: (#43)
Democrats and Britain's Labour have similar problems		 After BREXIT, Labour is through /
But Democrats have troubles too /
Voters will remember /
Come time next November /
That impeachment charade Dems will rue
2019-11-21: (#42)
On the so-called "Resistance"		 The Dems have been staging a coup /
To nullify voters like you /
But it will cost them plenty /
Since in 2020 /
They're up for reelection too
2019-11-06: (#41)
On the November 2019 election results		 In November, Fairfax County went Blue /
And all of Virginia did, too /
So we're officially 'woke' /
And soon we'll go broke /
'Cause our schools are not educating you
2019-10-29: (#40)
On al-Baghdadi's demise and WaPo's reaction		 That "austere religious scholar" is dead /
He blew himself up, lost his head /
The civilized world's gain /
Caused the Post to complain /
Subscribers should go elsewhere instead
2019-10-09: (#39)
On Adam Schiff's impeachment efforts		 Adam Schiff is the real-life Joker /
His antics appall today's voter /
While impeachment is pushed /
Legislation gets squooshed /
So for Dems, 2020's a choker
2019-08-15: (#38)
On Ken Cuccinelli's rework of Emma Lazarus' poem		 Your tired, your poor huddled mass /
When they over the border fence pass /
Yearn for stuff that is free /
But denied you and me /
Hence Ken Cuccinelli's blast
2019-08-03: (#37)
On blowback from FCSB's 'boundary change' consideration		 When 'One Fairfax' was begun /
The 'social justice' game was great fun /
Then school 'bussing' was mentioned /
It got parents' attention /
And the School Board is now on the run
2019-07-24: (#36)
On the Fx Co School Board's "social equity" crusade		 The School Board has gone off the rails /
On your kid's education it fails /
"Social Equity" is explored /
Parents' wishes are ignored /
May their votes in November prevail
2019-07-24: (#35)
On Bob Mueller's return before Congress		 Bob Mueller the Pious returned /
The Dems hoped the President to burn /
His performance as such /
Was embarrassing to watch /
Soapier than "As The World Turns"
2019-07-24: (#34)
On Congressman Omar's marriage arrangement		 While Oedipus married his mother /
Ilhan Omar married her brother /
But this fact is ignored /
By the Media hoard /
The perks of a "woman of color"
2019-07-16: (#33)
On the AOC-Pelosi hissy fit		 The AOC-Omar Squad /
Their panties are bunched in a wad /
It's Pelosi they battle /
With their victimhood prattle /
Sororicide on the Left ... Quite odd!
2019-07-05: (#32)
On Nike's 'Betsy Ross' shoe cancellation		 The Nike Company is 'woke' /
On Kaepernick's hatred they choke /
Their 'Betsy Ross' shoe /
Was pulled on his cue /
And Americans' anger they stoked
2019-05-30: (#31)
On Robert Mueller's partisan 9-minute speech upon closing down his Trump-Russia witch hunt		 Mueller the Pious just ended /
Non-partisan he pretended /
But to Congress he preached /
"It's for you to impeach" /
After $35 Mil was expended
2019-05-07: (#30)
On William Barr's Congressional inquisition		 "Jerrynattering" is not a crime /
But it's wasting Bill Barr's time /
The A-G's discovering /
And gradually uncovering /
His agency's embedded slime
2019-04-22: (#29)
On the Easter massacre in Sri Lanka		 The civilized world abhors /
Those Easter bombings du jour /
The Religion of Death /
And their friends on the Left /
Are barbarians to the core
2019-04-19: (#28)
After the release of Mueller's report		 That report from A-G Barr /
Two years, and nothing to jar /
The REAL news of the hour /
Was James Holzhauer /
That rising Jeopardy star
2019-04-10: (#27)
On Attorney General Barr's testimony to Congress		 When Attorney General Barr /
Was brought before Congress to spar /
He mentioned aside /
A soft coup was tried /
So Spygate may yet go far
2019-04-03: (#26)
On Joe Biden's past friendliness with women		 Joe Biden's a hands-on guy /
He's made the news lately, here's why /
Past expressions of affection /
Are now cause for rejection /
The PC crowd now says bye-bye
2019-03-28: (#25)
On the post-Mueller media		 The Press for two years on /
Their distaste for Trump was strong /
But when Mueller got finished /
Their narrative diminished /
And their credibility now is gone
2019-03-27: (#24)
On Jussie Smollett's free pass from prosecution in Chicago		 'Empire Man' committed a crime /
But his prosecution was declined /
So those with connections /
Can win special affections /
Lady Justice, it's clear, is not blind
2019-03-20: (#23)
On Democrats' wanting to lower the voting age to 16		 Dems want votes from 16-ers too /
More ballot harvesting to accrue /
But why not continue /
Put toddlers on the venue /
"Keep them comfortable" 'til they vote for you
2019-03-14: (#22)
On the Hollywood college admissions scam		 That college admissions scam /
Hollywood parents lead the plan /
Famous schools agreed /
For a princely fee /
Get a gentleman's C for your clan
2019-03-11: (#21)
On K-12 current public education		 K-12 education of yore /
Is now a dinosaur /
No phonics or math /
But sex-ed's a blast /
Indoctrination galore
2019-03-08: (#20)
On the 'Russian Collusion' meme		 While 'Russian Collusion' is gone /
The search for the unicorn goes on /
House committees will toil /
Burn the midnight oil /
'til the wrath of the voters dawns
2019-03-06: (#19)
Will Democrats be taken seriously in 2020?		 A-O-C has got ideas aplenty /
Of which people, it's clear, don't want any /
If Dems keep up this pace /
In the upcoming race /
They'll be doomed in 2020
2019-03-05: (#18)
Still a nation of laws?		 Our laws are currently two-tier /
Lady Justice is not blind, it's clear /
While the Left gets a pass /
Conservatives get the shaft /
Is Third-World status near?
2019-03-04: (#17)
On Congressional Democrats insisting on yet more Trump hearings		 Mueller on Trump cannot score /
Congressional Dems want more /
This obsession reminds /
Of an earlier time /
The McCarthy hearings of yore
2019-03-03: (#16)
On media coverage of the Trump/Kim talks vs the Michael Cohen soap opera		 While Trump was talking with Kim /
Michael Cohen was the Media's din /
Trump's effort was serious /
The Media's delirious /
Their credibility shot down again
2019-02-25: (#15)
On the demise of the Democrat Party		 The Democrat Party of yore /
Unfortunately is no more /
Their new leaders are nuts /
Hate America's guts /
Communist to the core
2019-02-24: (#14)
On historical context and the professionally offended		 Our culture considers a sin /
Things that were normal back then /
But what if our kind /
Were to go back in time /
Would they consider our culture a win?
2019-02-23: (#13)
On the Global Warming Industrial Complex		 'Global Warming' lost its zing /
So 'Climate Change' became the thing /
Now whatever weather's hue /
"Our predictions were true!" /
More grant money needed: Ka-Ching!
2019-02-22: (#12)
On Clinton corruption and the Russia hoax		 When Hillary thought she would win /
She needed to hide her past sins /
The Deep State complied /
A soft coup they tried /
But Trump is much stronger than them
2019-02-21: (#11)
On Left-wing media "confirmation bias"		 When 'Empire Man' creates a hoax /
He's believed by the likes of The Post /
But when Covington grins /
It's considered a sin /
No wonder their credibility is toast
2019-02-20: (#10)
On the relative seriousness of Watergate vs the current 'Deep State' scandal		 Watergate got WaPo's attention /
The 'Deep State' nary a mention /
But people have guessed /
As that banner suggests /
"Democracy Dies by Omission"
2019-02-19: (#9)
On how migrants from high-tax states infect their new homes		 When high taxes people can't take /
To low-tax locales they migrate /
But they vote the same way /
And then one day /
They're back to their original state
2019-02-18: (#8)
On how one side blames the other for sins of which they themselves are guilty		 For Palestinians: Israel is to blame /
For Democrats: Republicans the same /
Whether P-L-O man /
Or Party of the Klan /
Psychological Projection's the game
2019-02-08: (#7)
On the wisdom AOC, especially after that #GreenNewDeal fiasco		 Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez /
It's hard to believe what she says /
When she opens her mouth /
She embarrasses herself /
Not as smart as a dispenser of PEZ
2019-02-07: (#6)
On Republican passivity during Democrat scandals		 When Democrats go astray /
The Media they own look away /
Republicans keep quiet /
Then wonder why it /
Goes badly on election day
2019-02-05: (#5)
On the President's State Of The Union speech		 The Super Bowl was a bore /
SO-TU was of interest much more /
'Choosing Greatness' was touted /
The Democrats pouted /
And with Trump they remain at war
2019-02-01: (#4)
On how Trump Derangement Syndrome affects Congress and the Media		 To pols who choose Shutdown mode /
And journalists who choose Trump to goad /
As Obama told miners /
With his famous one-liners /
Perhaps you should just #LearnToCode
2019-01-30: (#3)
Fairfax Delegate Kathy Tran (D-42) introduces her Infanticide Bill ( HB2491) at the Virginia General Assembly		 New Delegate Kathy Tran /
The Infanticide bill was her plan /
Gov Northam agrees /
It's what the State needs /
His Hippocratic Oath be damned
2019-01-29: (#2)
FBI sends SWAT team to bring in Roger Stone		 Mueller wanted to get Roger Stone /
But it seemed unglamorous to phone /
So he sent a SWAT crew /
With CNN too /
And busted poor Roger at home
2019-01-24: (#1)
The March-for-Life bru-ha-ha with native-American Nathan Phillips and the Covington HS students		 That PocaSparticus man /
Disrupting the March was his plan /
Young Covinaugh smiled /
Fake news sites went wild /
As only the media can